Baked Hath Served over Black Beans and Topped with a Red and Green Cabbage Slaw

I humbly present a dish inspired by the alien who saved Martha Jones from drowning in quicksand. The fish is for the Hath, the black beans for the sludge he drowned in, and the red and green cabbage slaw for the colors of the Hath’s scales.

Now, there are two ways to make this dish; the tasty way and the fast way. For the fast way, just buy yourself some frozen tilapia in mango sauce, grab a can of black beans, and pick up a tub of coleslaw at the deli counter. Let’s make it the tasty way instead.

Fish:
2 tilapia filets
4 tbsp/60 ml orange juice
1 tbsp/15 ml olive oil
4 cloves of garlic, minced
1 tsp/5 g salt
½ tsp/2.5 g red pepper flakes

Slaw:
1/4 head of red cabbage
1/3 head of green cabbage
2 tbsp/30 ml rice wine vinegar
2 tbsp/30 ml orange juice
1 tbsp/15 ml sesame oil
1 tbsp/15 g mayonnaise
1 tbsp/15 g sugar
1 tsp/5 g ginger powder
½ tsp/2.5 g salt

Black Beans:
1 14 oz/400 g can of black beans
½ cup/220 g cooked yellow corn/maize
1 tomato, diced
½ onion, diced
2 cloves garlic, minced
1 tsp/5 g cumin
Juice of ½ lime

For the fish, whisk together everything but the tilapia in a shallow bowl. Once you have a bowl of tasty citrus goodness, coat both sides of the fish as thoroughly as possible, then leave it soaking in the marinade for at least an hour.

While the fish is soaking, make the coleslaw. If you’ve never made coleslaw from scratch, I promise it’s a lot easier than you think. For this one, mix everything but the cabbage in a large bowl. Blend it all as thoroughly as possible. While those ingredients are cheerfully mingling, it’s time to take a hatchet to the cabbages. If you have a large chef’s knife or, if you’re very lucky, a butcher knife, making coleslaw is fun. You can roughly dice it into squares, precisely cut it into nice, long slivers, or you can go crazy just hacking away at it in a mad frenzy of vegetative destruction until you come out of your fugue state and find a pile of thin cabbagy slices in front of you. I won’t judge.

Mix the two types of cabbage together then throw them in the bowl with your dressing and do your best to coat all the cabbage. This isn’t a thick, gloppy dressing. It should be light, even a little thin, creating an aromatic coating. Let the coleslaw sit at room temperature until the fish is fully cooked so the flavors will have plenty of time to mingle.

Finally, make the black beans. Watching Martha’s poor Hath friend drown in that lumpy, black sludge inspired this recipe to begin with. Mix everything but the beans into a bowl. Stir it hard, until everything is well blended. Drain the can of black beans then add them to the bowl and gently coat them with the mix. It's pretty easy. By now, your fish should be nicely marinated. Preheat an oven to 400F/205C. Coat the bottom of a glass baking dish with butter or olive oil. Put the fish in the dish, pour the marinade on top, and bake it uncovered for 20 minutes or until the fish flakes easily with a fork.

This makes two hearty servings. Divide the black beans between two plates and spread them into a neat oval. Top the black beans with your freshly baked fish. If there’s any sauce at the bottom of the pan, spoon a tablespoon or two onto each tilapia filet. Top the tilapia with a carefully arranged handful of the fresh slaw and fill in the rest of the plate with extra slaw.

You now have the entire episode encapsulated on one plate. To complete the effect, this dish is best served with a lime green Jell-O shot.

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You can find plenty of recipes for your Doctor Who viewing party (plus lots of other version of fish fingers and custard) in Dining With The Doctor: The Unauthorized Whovian Cookbook.